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Believing In Yourself

I was blessed in life with a wonderful mother. There was a time when I would do everything I could to put a smile on her face because she went through too much that she didn't deserve, a time when I was her shoulder to lean on, her daughter to talk to, and a time when I remember a mom that could never see what you saw in her, I saw an amazing strong woman all the days of my life. But, at times because of circumstances and hurt, she didn't agree with that. Today, my mother is a much happier stronger woman than she was, she is someone who decided to go back to school, a woman who decided to look for what she deserved, and a woman who knows that there are no boundaries of what she can accomplish for yourself because she can do anything. She raised me with a lot of self respect and when I was a troubled teenager I didn't understand her views, now being a mother and a woman I know that she is the greatest mother in the world. She accepted me even when I did not make her proud, she taught me to appreciate my uniqueness, and most importantly how much I need to love myself or everything will fall apart. So in honor of my mother today's post is going to be about self worth, one thing that I know she sees as very important. There are certain rules that I find are important to loving yourself and so I'm going off of those. The first rule is that no one is in charge of your happiness, except you. The reason for this is that if your unhappy with yourself no one can change that, the power to pick yourself up or to change your attitude, your life, and yourself falls on you. In every aspect of your life remember that. Secondly I want you to remember that you can not love anyone until you love yourself. It is not possible because in love you have to make choices where you put your happiness first and require you to love and respect yourself. One of these choices is that you have to let go of anything that does not make you grow or make you happy. And I'm not talking dramatically that if one person makes one negative comment that doesn't make you happy that you get rid of them from your life, absolutely not, what I am saying is that in life you need to focus on what makes you happy or makes you grow as a person. The next rule is one that I try to hold close to my heart in all situations and it is one that I never forget no matter what I go through. "No one can make you feel inferior without your own consent." -Eleanor Roosevelt. It may be a quote, but it is a very intelligent sentence made by a very strong woman. No one can make you feel any different about yourself, your beliefs, no one can hurt you, can take away your confidence, unless you give them that power. All that matters if how you see yourself and how strong you are. The next rule is that though you love yourself, you will still have flaws. Stop focusing on them. Being confident and having self worth doesn't mean your perfect and I hope no one takes this as making yourself self absorbed, because that is not at all what I mean in fact being confident means accepting that you aren't perfect, and that you celebrate your imperfections. There is nothing wrong with being yourself and in most cultures, people will accept you for it. Lol. You will still have times of feeling worthless, you will still get down, and you will still go through hard times, but you'll go through those times being a lot stronger and more confident of what you can handle than you were before. The next rule is one from one of my most favorite women, Marilyn Monroe. Why you ask? Because she was a woman who is perfect for this topic, she made herself an icon looking like no one else, she said things that people didn't accept, and she did things that a lot of people looked down upon. She rose to be a big star after being an orphan and having hard life experiences, but she stayed her. And that is the most important lesson of all is no matter what you go through, whatever tries to knock you over to stay you and to stay proud of who you are. She said, "Wanting to be someone else is a waste of the person you are." And it is another completely intelligent quote. There is only one you, we are all different, why waste that having set standards for yourself? The standards you should set for yourself are ones that don't exist, and if someone tries to limit you into a small box, break it open and be yourself. And the last and final rule that I am going to write is to make peace with you. Often with a troubled past people tend to blame themselves for what happened to them or to hold onto past mistakes. If you want to change you and start anew the first place you have to start is within yourself. If you don't believe that you have moved forward then the only opinion that truly matters does, because the only step towards change is deciding that you are moving forward and you are forgiving yourself for the past. The reward to all of these steps is that you get a future when your down on yourself, have blinders on, and can't see how beautiful you are, you limit yourself. Do you like it when others talk bad about you? Does it feel nice? Because all your doing is exactly what they are, your believing them. The limits are limitless. Say that to yourself when you feel as though you fail, when you can't go on, because when you don't succeed there is no excuses, no one you can blame but yourself because you didn't believe the your limits are limitless. You are capable of anything that you set for yourself, remember that. There was a woman who put the words, "YOU DESERVE IT." in big letters on her wall in her kitchen, she walked past it everyday, three times a day when she was hungry. By 60 days, she had it constantly going through her head and she started to believe it. So friends, my challenge to you keep those words in your head that help you love yourself and write them every time you feel like giving up. Words like, "YOUR BEAUTIFUL" or "STAY STRONG." Whatever you need to hear and don't make it so you have to hear it from anyone else, but yourself. Because you are the only one who can make you believe it. And when you believe in yourself, you become UNSTOPPABLE. Goodnight everyone. :)

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