My favorite quote of all time is, "If they give you lined paper, write the other way." I try my hardest to apply this quote to every aspect of my life. The meaning to me is that you don't have to devote yourself to living to anyone else's standards, you are free to be who you are. Not everyone will accept you, love you, or respect who you are, but the way I look at it is that it will be your Judgement Day. What is more important to you, looking good to everyone else and going out of your way to put off a certain image or being yourself and having someone accept and love you for your true heart? I wanna go with the second one. On that day, when I meet God face to face, I want to know that even if I had flaws, mistakes, and regrets that the one thing that I don't regret is that I was honest, outspoken, and true to myself. That my life I led was my own and that I wasn't just a mindless sheep following others, but that I choose my own path and that even if I went alone I went the way I felt I needed to go. When I was 12 the first song I ever wrote to God was, "Jesus, I'm Amazed." The end verse says, "He died for you, and you are going to stand there and reject him, tell me what are you going to do, when you run out of time, and you have to stand on that throne, confront all you did wrong, what will say to your God? I will lift up my hands and sing your praise, this is my way of saying, Jesus, I am amazed, no matter what I have to do, no matter how long it takes, and whatever I have to do, God I am willing, sometimes it's hard to keep on living, but I'll take it day by day, I will trust in you and you'll give me the faith."Being the person I live for is God, I need no one else's stamp of approval. In that song, I didn't write whatever I have to do for everyone else, I wrote that I would take everyday to give my all to God, to go through the trials I needed to, that I was willing to devote my life to him and that I was going to trust in him to guide my life. I truly believe that every person no matter how they are, was made perfectly and wonderfully by God and that God makes no mistakes. But being yourself is hard when you have bricks thrown at you by anyone who doesn't accept you or love you. Luckily though, as always, I have a quote for that situation too. "A successful person is one that takes the bricks others throw at them and builds a firm foundation." The meaning of this quote to me is that the "bricks" are hateful words meant to break you and defeat you, but that you let them roll off of your back, move forward, and you take them and use them to build you stronger. Painful experiences and hateful words to me are some of the greatest blessings in this life because they make it so we have to rise above them, they bring out our inner survivor, and give us ammo to take an obstacle and overcome it. I don't like anything bad that I have experienced, but those trials made me stronger, made me the woman I am today, and most importantly made it so that the only validation I need to love myself is God's love. No one else needs to hold me up, needs to pay me attention, needs to make me feel enough, or to accept the way I live because the only person I need to accept and love me is God and he has already saved me from having to burn for my mistakes, my failures, and my flaws. He has already proven that love by sending his son to die on the cross. "for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God." -Romans 3:23 No matter how hard I try to be perfect, no matter how much I try to impress others, and no matter how flawless I may look to anyone, I still will fall short of the glory of God. I will still be a sinner, I will still fall short, at the end of the day all I can do is be true to myself and be the good person that he has called me to be. Put my best foot forward and I may fail at it over and over, I may not be accepted by a lot of people, and I will still not be perfect, but one thing I will do is I will keep trying to be the best I can be and I will never forget the sacrifice he made for me through his son and though I know I will never be worthy of his love, I know that I am blessed to have God in my life, my heart, and to get to be alive and show as much love as I can being myself. Now as we have said we will do with every topic we can leave it at the foot of the cross, and I'm going to put my prayer,
"Lord, I know that I fall short of you and that my life can always be strengthened and I ask that you keep working on me and showing me what is important in this life, help me to accept everyone for who they are and love them and accept them no matter what their faults and flaws may be. Help me take everyday as an opportunity to put my best foot forward and be true to myself. I leaving my need to other's approval, the hateful words anyone has said to me about my faults and flaws, and I'm leaving them at the foot of the cross because you gave me the only acceptance I needed in this life when you saved me from my chains. In Jesus name, Amen."